Change Your Story, Change Your Life.

04 Mar Change Your Story, Change Your Life.

Change Your Story, Change Your Life.

Much has been written about that ideology - Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra and now Chris Arnold:)

Tony Robbins frames the narrative around mindset, about changing limiting beliefs.

Deepak Chopra frames it around mind/body connection and again around limiting beliefs.

I'm going to frame it around Identity whilst ignoring limiting beliefs.

I'm not convinced limiting beliefs are a negative thing. They simply don't align with our perceived desire at the time. A lot of times, we desire things that are not in our best interest. That will lead us down paths we may eventually reject. Limiting beliefs can be our safeguard.

Both Robbins and Chopra make a very good business out of persuading people to embrace The Power of Positive Thinking. Being empowered, not disempowered. They claim everyone can have whatever they desire, simply by shedding those limiting beliefs.

I believe that to be the case but many who embark on that journey soon discover they are on a path that does not serve them. The goals they seek come at the expense of things they value. They quit. Perhaps they should never have started?

I'm more in favour of improving skills/strengths we already possess than in addressing limiting beliefs.

Let me give you an example -

An estate agent/realtor might believe they could never shoot a video series because they aren't comfortable in front of camera.

Encouraging them to dismiss those limiting beliefs will have them focus on their perceived weakness. Addressing those perceived weaknesses will take time, but more importantly, will compromise strengths they already possess.

People pushing limiting beliefs claim such beliefs should be addressed and overcome, that it's wrong to think if they are ignored they will go away.

I believe the opposite. I believe that if you do ignore them, they will not exist.

Things only exist in our version of the world because our perspective and perception gives rise to our experience.

Every beautiful human being has talent - it's simply a matter of uncovering it.

If you're not comfortable at shooting video, don't do it. Don't be persuaded that because everybody else is doing it, poorly in some cases, so should you.

Invest time and effort, instead, in something far more interesting - Identity.

Who  you are, self-awareness, introspection, mindfulness,; call it what you will but it's the choice to be who you are, at your best.

People are more interested in Who you are than in What you do, or how well seemingly you do it.

I'm intrigued when I see apparently successful agents proudly sharing their success stories, or others attempting to establish authority by positioning themselves as a 'local property expert'. Some sharing hobbies, others opinion on the state of the industry/world.

Hiding in plain sight is how I term them.

Desperate for attention, hopeful for engagement and unconcerned that every other agent is doing precisely the same thing. Content that is fast becoming irrelevant to everyone but themselves.

Hiding, because they wear this 'mask' that prevents anyone from seeing the real them. What they value and believe. Their story of what makes them believe those things.

I'm all for agents claiming to be "passionate" but, instead of simply telling us they are, why not share with us your definition of passionate and reasons why that passion is aroused?

That's how we change the story and as a consequence, how we change our life.

Attracting a different audience with whom your new story resonates.

Gone is the "polite, professional, charming and perfected" agent.

Replaced with the story of why politeness matters and how you came to embrace it in your life and your business.

Gone is the "professional" image - a stereotype that few believe.

Instead, an authentic story of life's roller-coaster ride.

Gone the idiot suggestion from a certain "trainer" that charming will win trust and influence results. As though it's some sort of optional upgrade.

Instead, sharing the stories of how genuine kindness mattered more than the end result.

Perfected? We should be so lucky, lucky, lucky.

Most will run a mile at the suggestion of the perfected agency

And yet that's what vendors/landlords are asked to believe - "award-winning, best-in-breed, 5-star, paragon of virtue"

Change that story to what made them what they are, or better still, the people that made them so.

Then you change your life.

Stories are how community functions. Stories are memorable. Stories that are emotional have a profound impact on the listener.

Change your story, change your life.

Tell them the story that only you can tell. There's no-one you couldn't love once you've heard their story.

Thanks, as always, for reading. If you need help telling your story, here's how to reach me:

chris@andsothestorybegan.co.uk

www.andsothestorybegan.co.uk

Mob: (44) 07369251435

Chris.