Identity – There’s Bad News I’m Afraid.

Identity – There’s Bad News I’m Afraid.

Identity – There’s bad news, I’m afraid.

Something out there is ruining relationships.

It’s ruining career & money.


Body image.


Even politics.

But worst of all, it’s ruining your Identity.

So says Katherine Ormerod in her new book, Why Social Media is Ruining Your Life.

But first of all, consider the commercial implications and a CMO report that highlights social media spending accounting for 13.8% of a brands’ total marketing budget.

Yet 40% of brands are unable to show the impact of social media advertising.

Let alone prove the ROI!

Ad blockers and ad-blindness are at an all-time high.

Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp users are declining ever faster.

Microsoft reports that the average attention span on social media is just 8 seconds.

Tech Futurist and blockchain consultant, Michael K. Spencer, has this to say:


“As the exodus from social media continues to increase, it’s time to grow up and move out of apps.

An attention economy out of sync with a real sales funnel is proving problematic, to say the least.

It also amounts to Facebook and Google nearly committing fraud for smaller brands that just want a piece of the pie and the ability to reach their target customers.”


And yet, social media ‘guru’s’ still recommend this course of action.

Right on cue, a well-known social media agency for estate agents sends an email, thinly disguised as a sales pitch: 


Looking to Do Business Locally?  LinkedIn Can Help.

” A greater number of connections (on LinkedIn) places your business in front of more people and statistics indicate that having more connections leads to more endorsements.”


That ubiquitous assumption again.

The more people that see your brand, the greater the chance of selling something.

I’ve said it before.

It’s not having more people see your brand (exposure/attention).

It’s having the right people see your brand (affinity/relationships).

Social Media is NOT the panacea for your agency’s troubles.

Michael K. Spencer continues:

“Many of us have or will soon break up with social media and our favourite apps.  The entire social media business model was not just hijacked, but basically led nowhere for Western consumers.  It was advertising fraud, if you will.  A digital dead end.”

He then poses the question:

“Where will we go after social media and useless apps?  That’s not even clear – hopefully back to living more balanced and fulfilling lives.”


What is clear, to a few, is that business now needs to own the media.  Rather than pay others for their dubious audience.

Create your own media company.

Your own distribution network via a blog. Via a podcast.  Via a video post.

Front-end media that drives business to your back-end agency.

A media company where you control the content.  And where you control the distribution.

Something that can grow into a business asset, rather than the business expense of social media.

Whether you decide to own the media or not, it’s vital that you prevent social media from ruining your identity.

That matters far more than a wasted few thousand pounds on LinkedIn or Facebook campaigns.

How’s social media ruining identity?


Online identity is often the perfected, hyper-curated version of the offline persona.

All the negative thoughts, the disappointments and the rejections airbrushed for public consumption.

Instead, we get a glut of self-congratulatory posts.  photos of the new set of wheels and video rants and rambles from inside said car.

Flaunting the new watch.  Bragging about the promotion. The holiday.

What’s the point of success if nobody knows about it, seems to be the message.

Seth Godin puts it this way:

“Inadequacy on parade.

A never-ending stream of pictures.  People who are prettier than you, happier than you, more confident than you. Weddings that are fancier than yours was, with sun-dappled trees, luscious desserts and delighted relatives.  Or perhaps it’s the status updates from everyone who is where you aren’t, but wish you were.

And the billboards and the magazine ads always show us the people we’d like to be, instead of the people we are.

In the short run, gazing at all this perfection gives us a short hit of dopamine, a chance to imagine what it might be like.

Over time, though, the grinding inadequacy caused by the marketing machine wears us down.

It’s O.K to turn it off.”


And lacking from this fantasyland of excellence?

Aside from anything of interest to the majority, what’s lacking is authenticity.

Most, don’t believe what they’re being shown.  And if they do believe, then anxiety is the path they now follow.

And so it’s replicated.  Me too.

Ad nauseam.  Hiding in plain sight,  instead of standing out.

Real life’s not like that.  It’s full of mistakes.  Missed opportunities. And things we should have said.

Authenticity allows you to stand out.  Warts and all.   Rather than fitting in.

Will you be remembered?

Amongst the thousands of identical me-too posts on social media?

8 seconds, remember.

That’s all you’ve got to make that lasting impression.

If you can’t fix this problem of poor identity, people will see you for what you post.

Perceived, sometimes, as a fake.  A braggard.

Not for who you actually are.

Someone far more interesting and memorable.

Someone with a story to tell.

A Personal Brand that resonates, instead of one stifled.

Bad news it may be, but on the flip side.

You can fix it.

What stories can your competitors not tell?

What’s your ‘origin’ story?

What are your values, beliefs and convictions?

Not the same as most, for sure.

But for those that share them, you now have affinity.

People that believe what you believe.  People that like what you say.

People that care.

That minimum viable audience that wants to go where you’re going.

The alternative is a life that’s probably not too far removed from the one you have now.

The purgatory of inadequacy and endless comparisons.

Social media intoxication isn’t helping.

Even a little bit.

You might need help to quit.

Or, you can simply let it ruin your life.

Get in touch if you’d like to chat.

mob: (44) 07875141436

Thanks, as always, for reading.



















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